Harlequin Daydreams

I Had A Dream Last Night

I had a dream last night, when sleep finally called me friend.

It was…a strange one, involving me waking.

I woke up and it was morning

i was in a big bed with jade green sheets of high thread count

My hair longer than its ever been and just curly as it is now.

I was smaller, thinner, careworn, with tiny stretchmarks in places only mother’s know

Nestled against my bosom like a sweet little cherubim was a child

A boy, skin like mocha mixed with heavy rich cream and eyes such a bright brown they  almost reminded me of robust honey

He looked up at me with a smile on his face that told me i was the only woman in the world

I was his mother and mother is god in the eyes of a child.

I kissed his temple threw soft black hair that was thick but soft

Hanging around his head like a dark halo

I tickled soft baby fat and made breakfast with him

Clothed him carefully and made him laugh

We watched cartoons, played video games, laughed and smiled

He called me “ma” instead of mom or mommy

The strangest thing, was that there was no man to speak of

No man in the house, no man at work, no man in the mind of this “mother” me

No man was linked to this child, none that I could account for

Or perhaps a man existed and was not apart of this world.

Either way, in this dream, I had this boy I didn’t know in my lap

This boy with no name

But i knew he was mine

So we sat here in the light of this comfy one bedroom apartment and i realized

I felt a swell of happiness that I’ve never felt in the entirety of my life

In all my depression, in all my misery this one eerie prophetic dream

Made me feel calmer and happier than anyone ever could…

Wonder what it means…

-HarliqueenNight-

Sweet Whispers

Do you know its difficult sometimes

To differenciate from what I mean 

What I think I mean

And what I wish I meant

-

Words roll like candy from my lips

Whispering into your ears

Expressing what i hope and pray is what you wish to hear

Despite how it appears in my mind

And in return you caress my lips with sweet words

Crumbling like fine sugar cubes

That make my little candies seem stale

Like those in the sticky jars left over from Christmas

Handed out to be rid of them

And unwillingly accepted out of politeness

-

Out of what politeness do you accept my words

When in my mind I can’t discern nor despel the very horrible thought of

Do you feed me these sugar cubes of fine star dust

Because you enjoy the tinge of sweetness left on my lips

Or because you hope to rekindle a feeling comfort where you have none

In the uncontrollable throes of your life

Though tiny alongside mine, but no less substantial

Within the calm secret meadow between my breasts

-

Yet as i wonder of these things

I feel guilty of assumption

Of attempting to spy on your innermost thoughts

In order to confirm or disprove this fear and doubt

When I tear the maps and burn every account of my own mind

Just to keep you from it

While struggling to say things how I mean it

Express it how it is meant to be expressed

And have it be heard with attentive ears

In a form that shall not be misunderstood

Though it always has been

-

My whispers choke me sometimes

The candy becoming syrup in my throat

Unlike the soothing coat of honey

That makes my words smooth and untainted

It horribly suffocates my meaning

and strangles all sense from vocal cords

rendering the melodies I often play in your ear mute

-

My whispers choke me sometimes

And I wish there was no doubt

But the long pauses between whispers

Will, without cause or fault, drive me to them once more

-

My whispers choke me sometimes

And if they do

Then perhaps the pauses will drown me

-Harliqueen Night-

Chronicles of a Midnight Girl

“One Chance Encounter?”

*

At the balcony window overlooking the night

Midnight snuck up on her and woke her before longing could

And she woke long before the deities could do so

Her hair lifted by winters breeze far too cold for both

Her lack of attire mostly

And her frigid heart

She stands there

pale light glinting off the glass showcasing her heart

and off the sensual curves that offer more attraction than said heart ever could

*

Tonight

She breathes in deep

The bitter nip of frost on her tongue

As the Night World wakens without her

Tempting her just to stay inside where this wind

This change on the breeze cannot permeate the world she knows

That’s it.

Something has changed

Or rather

Something has arrived

*

Still

The midnight girl chooses her attire

Her stiletto percussion

But slides on a coat to shield the already weakened glass

From the piercing cold as to not stop her heart

Which threatens not to beat at all tonight

Tip Tap Tip

Out of the abandon hotel of star crossed lovers and broken dreams

Where she felt safer than she does now venturing out into the night

Her basket in the crook of her arm

Invisible to the naked eye

But Visible to the carnal fantasy

Her feet take her into the land of neon and chrome

*

Tip Tap Tip

Off curves

 into streets black like Mississippi undertow

Ready to engulf you into the abyss

Hold you down

Steal your breath

Her eyes rove over the unsuspecting

Waiting to drag them down with her

Show stopper that she is

Imagine that they would risk being ridiculed

Or even a night on the couch just to follow her into the street

To answer an invitation not given and offer not made

She collects her hearts and moves on

*

But its so stale

The presence of lovers, loves, and toys impress her not

And the repetitive words of flattery and promises

From lips that would scream her name in ecstasy

But would not be able to recall it later when the sun replaced her in bed

One heart, two

All ripped still beating from the chests of gullible

Whom are now infected

Singing to the ashes of their lost hearts

And all falling down in her wake

With of course not so much as a glance over the shoulder

*

The night has brought no comfort

Her heart aches and she wonders if this shall be nights end for her

The diamonds falling fake as rhinestones from around her eyes

She takes sanctuary in the thought that once dawn came

She becomes regular woman and can rejuvenate herself

Dammit

This was what it was like to not have your heart in it

So few lives to take or rather so few desirable for taking

It wasn’t fair

She wanted to sleep

The stars in her eyes dim

The crushed pearls in her hair feel like nothing more than sand

It aches so bad

*

As she walks aimlessly towards night’s end

She spots the trail of crushed hearts and thinks

“These heartaches be not mine

These are hearts I’ve never clutched much less have captured.”

Not certain of this source of subtle misery

Which she swears she had no hand in

Her percussion follows her as she makes her way back to her lair

To rinse away the Midnight Venus that

In all her glory

Makes no discernible impression on the mind of her victims

But under the glow of a dying street lamp

Her head of pearls turn over her shoulder

Her starlit eyes peer over the trail of blood

Giving glowing beauty to its tragedy before going beyond

Perhaps capturing the eye of the source

Before turning back around pearls glittering and diamonds shimmering

Stepping just out of sight…

To be continued

-Harliqueen Night-